Thursday, March 26, 2009

Optimistically Cautious....

Ok, I admit it. I'm a bit freaked out. I'm not exactly a glass half empty person but I am aware that if dropped...glass breaks! A realist of sorts. I weigh the options. Plan out the worst case scenario. I gave the whole jumping in thing a try a couple months back and it blew up in my face.

Fast forward to now. Got the pieces back together and headed back out. Feeling a bit braver and looking for greatness. "Take a few new risks" I say. At least I can have a few hilarious stories for the blog. I usually have the best ones about my run ins with guys. I have met some rather interesting folks in my pursuit of "someone".

Brief recap: there was the emotionally unavailable train wreck I was seeing when I moved to Boston. Great guy but some girl broke him. That was a whole lot of fun.... Then I give online dating a try. What the heck else do you do in a new town when you don't know anyone? There was the socially retarded writer that took me all of three minutes to want to actually consider a bathroom window escape. SPEAK! Use your words! I can talk to myself at home! Then was the guy who liked my shoes more than me....hummm. Really? Some day he's going to wake up and realize just how great other guys are and will live happily ever after. He actually out witted me and got me to go out with him for a second date. He used reason against me. I can be such a sucker for a challenge. Next, I met the jobless, functional alcoholic. Breaking up with him was like trying to nail jello to a tree! A couple meaningless flings and a few false starts later and I'm back to looking.....

I made the decision that dating with in "the group" is not the best idea. When it fizzles you are kind of stuck with that person. I am done with the awkward silences. The "what's going on with those two" whispers. Here I am back in the online dating thing. I was expecting a few bad dates. Some "quiet" evenings. Some dirty old men looking for a thirty something by pretending to be at least a decade younger.....Here's the weird part. I met a, dare I say, quality person. Not a hundred percent this is the guy for me, but a normal person. Job, car, house, looks, personality, responsible, and actually understands and shares my sense of humor? Really? Who would have thunk? Certainly not me.....

Oh no, I'm not quite done yet! The job situation is getting weirder. I was offered a job today. That in itself is a story for another day (and perhaps a continuing saga). I did mostly turn the job down based on the fact that it was a start up company. The man had big dreams. I give him credit but I just don't know if I can go along for the ride. We may work out a freelance option but I have to give this one some more thought. Looking through my portfolio again today and giving the same schpeel again makes me miss designing so much. I was damn good at my job. I'm not very cocky about much but this I can't help myself. I miss the adrenaline of the sale. I think half of the fun today was selling this guy on hiring me.

I'm sitting here on the couch trying to process all of this and figure out what I want to do and the phone rings. Oh yes, there is more to my day! My landlord is on the phone. Seems as though all of the stress she has been causing me about this house, well, she has changed her mind! WOW! She and I had an agreement when I moved in that I was going to buy this house. I had a budget. She agreed. Then she decided to raise the price 30K. There went that plan. Today~she calls and offers me the house for the original price and she wants to get the paperwork under way the beginning of the week.

I could be wrong but I think my brain might just explode. Can I have this much happiness going on all at the same time? Good Luck getting to sleep tonight......

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